Upon Reflection
by Skyelyr Shepard
Summary: She is the first human Spectre, her lover is the second, and the rest of her team are legends of their own right. This isn't a story about them though. Instead, a serviceman aboard the Normandy reflects on Shepard's legacy and realizes that living up to the legend is less about your strengths on the battlefield and more about your strengths off.


_A short scene aboard the Normandy during ME3, from the POV of a Serviceman._

"**Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness. And they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legend.**" – Jim Harrison

* * *

They stride into the room and time seems to slow. They're the embodiments of grace and beauty and together they draw every eye in the room.

What are the chances. Humanity's only two SPECTREs, and they happen to be lovers.

The man is Major Alenko, but Kaidan to the select few who've made it onto the dream team. He's compassionate and intelligent with the kind of silent courage that makes others feel better with him at their backs. He's a powerful biotic, a skilled field doctor and a calm commander. The man is a legend. And, if not for the woman beside him, he could be counted as the most desired of all humans.

Shepard, now she's another matter. She's tall, and almost the same height as Kaidan in her armor. And she's gorgeous. Fit, with her body sculpted into all the right planes, she's a sculptor's dream and a lover's downfall. Well any ordinary lover's anyway.

She's courageous too, but it's fiery and pure, unlike Kaidan's quiet contentment. She's capable of drawing every eye and breath with a simple smile, much less her passionate speeches. Some have said, and many more think silently to themselves, that Shepard herself contains the best of humanity; distilled.

Her and Kaidan aren't obvious. They don't touch each other, don't tease or flirt, don't favor each other in decisions. But at the same time, they're incredibly obvious. So much heat cannot help but escape and warm those around it.

As the story goes, they became lovers on the first Normandy, during their legendary campaign against Saren. It is like a fairytale to many people. Among the Alliance, they are both legends of their own right, especially Shepard. But their tryst is on the level of the ancient tale of Romeo and Juliet; of two souls drawn together despite everything else. No one else commands higher respect among the troops. Kaidan and Shepard are, well, becoming a legend of their own.

And they stride into the room and everyone looks around. Young servicemen pale or blush, older servicemen smile and Shepard and Kaidan are laughing together. It's Shepard in the front of the pack, in full armor, dusty from the battlefield, holding her helmet under her arm and walking gracefully next to Kaidan. He is armored as well, his blue armor contrasting with her red armor and his whiskey colored eyes crinkling in the corners as he smiles at something she said. Behind Shepard walks Garrus Vakarian, an urban legend in the flesh, Tali Zorah vas Normandy, the best known engineer in the galaxy, Liara T'Soni, the Shadowbroker in the flesh, and Lieutenant James Vega, an N-forces trainee and Anderson's new protégée.

James and Garrus are grinning together. They're quite similar in demeanor, though James has a youthful exuberance for Garrus's grizzled toughness. Tali and Liara are calm and happy, having been friends for many years. Of all this team, only James has not served with Shepard before, yet his skills on the battlefield and his cheerful attitude off have cemented him among them.

The dream team. That's what many call them, the people who serve or have served closely with Shepard. Two powerful krogan, ex-Cerberus operatives, an STG specialist, a justicar, the galaxy's premier assassin; and the list just keeps going. Shepard befriended them all.

And yet here I am; a lowly technician among a company of gods. And yet Shepard smiles at me suddenly and turns her deep green gaze on me.

_How's the supply situation _she says in her voice like liquid gold.

A stammered reply and she gazes more closely. Her eyes are as wide and endless as the oceans on Earth.

_You're meant to be here, _she says softly. _I trust you to live up to your reputation Serviceman Burns. _

Her reassurance washes away the grit of fear and self-doubt.

_Understood Ma'am. _A pause. _Thank you. _

A sharp nod and she turns to leave. Then she stills for a moment and turns back.

_You know, I could use your opinion on another matter. Walk with me? _

And so, that's how I, a mere serviceman, fell into step beside the Shepard of legend and her team.

The major smiles at me, a gentle and soft smile for such a formidable of a soldier. Garrus nods to me and James winks. Tali and Liara move unconsciously for me to walk amongst them, still both laughing at something.

And we move down the hallway together. Shepard listens to me, comments occasionally and smiles once. We pass the wide reflective surface of the memorial wall, and I glance over.

It's poetic to watch their faces reflect off the black granite, among names of those who've gone before. Some were on _The Team _but all were on the team. Shepard's team. My face stares back at me, nestled amongst the names.

_Someday, you will join us_ the names say.

And it's not fear I feel, but pride. Shepard's team is on that wall. Shepard will also be on that wall. And so will I.

The woman herself catches the direction of my gaze and pauses a moment. Her team passes us by.

_Don't be afraid _she says.

_I'm not afraid I'll appear here,_ I say quietly. _I'm proud._

She glances sideways at me. Her face is expressionless, but her eyes appraise me. Then she nods slightly. She looks back at the wall, her gaze hard.

_Well said_, she says.

There is a heartbeat of silence in which the great Commander Shepard: Hero of the Blitz, first human SPECTRE, Savior of the Citadel, Butcher of Arotaht, Champion of the Earth, and I, share a moment. The gravity of the situation surrounds us both. For a split second, I feel the weight of death and despair. And I know Shepard feels it too. Then she nods once more.

_Dismissed, Serviceman _she says calmly, and turns to join her team.

_Not her whole team _a voice in my head whispers. _You're a part of her team too._

I look back at the wall for one more moment. My face is calm and set. A soldier's face. As I pass the med-bay window, Shepard looks up from her team and I catch her eye. She is smiling broadly at something Garrus just said, and when her eyes meet mine, her smile changes slightly. It is soft and comfortable and friendly. I round the corner and pass out of her sight.

_Make your family proud. Make Shepard proud. Make yourself proud._

I square my shoulders and begin to fill my head with the diagnostic schemes Shepard and I had just discussed. But Shepard's words stick with me.

_You're meant to be here._


End file.
